Women Beat Each Other Up

Opinion
By Katie Deem
When women are among women, our like experiences bring us together. We can discuss freely menstruation, sex, menopause, make-up, politics, history, and the economy. A kind of sisterhood forms us, unites us, and bonds us together. In that sisterhood, we will always be heard and understood.

Sometimes, however, an unknown force pulls us apart, keeps women at odds even before they have an opportunity to see commonalities. That force is female aggression. It is the cat walk with claws, an evil glance, a cold shoulder, a smirk, gossip, backstabbing, Girl vs. Girl, a mean and hateful attitude not supported by reality.

Adolescence intensifies this competition between females. In junior high and high school, it is most noticeable. The film Mean Girls, starring Lindsay Lohan, shows how competitive girls can be in a perceived social hierarchy. Girls fight over boyfriends, talk about one another maliciously, choose and lose best friends as if no emotional attachment exists. This social aggression and competitiveness continues into adulthood.

Some adult women still talk maliciously about other women, judge their appearance, their accomplishments, their husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends and family. Some adult women perform covert operations to ensure that their cattiness appears subtle or even invisible. While gossiping, they employ catlike precision to ensure that their target is unaware of their words.

Sometimes in perceived social hierarchies, women compete to be the center of attention, the “queen bee” of the office, a group of friends, or the classroom. Women see other women as a threat to their sense of belonging and security. Often if one woman receives attention, achieves or excels, other women in her presence become jealous and criticize features of her personality or even her body.

Though competition between females is often seen as a natural occurrence, inevitable in our sisterhood, women need to understand that this gossip, incessant backstabbing and judging destroy our bonds to one another. Remember that we teach our daughters how to live through our own actions. They form their sisterhood with their peers similarly to how we form ours. Let us show them also how to respect and be honest with one another.